Tisucu i jedna noc

 

Na danasnji dan prije godinu dana, 15.7.2021., zauvijek je zaspala moja draga bakica...

Ovaj post zelim posvetiti njoj i ovoj boli koju osjecam, koja mi prozima cijelo tijelo i dusu...

Iako je moja baka vec bila jako stara i u zadnje vrijeme tesko bolesna i bez volje za zivotom, iako sam znala da je spremna predati se i samo sam cekala vijest o njezinom odlasku, kada sam tog cetvrtka ujutro, prije godinu dana, primila taj poziv i saucesce od osoblja koje se brinulo o njoj, bilo je to kao da se nesto u meni slomilo, kao da je svijet stao i kao da je bio kraj jednog dijela mog zivota, jedinog do sada meni poznatog, a njezinim odlaskom kao da ulazim u neko sasvim drugo poglavlje svoga zivota...

Imala sam tu srecu u životu, da sam imala dvije mame i dva tate. 

Tvoje sam ime zapisala u temelje svoje kuće, kada sam tek učila pisati i taj natpis još stoji i podsjetnik je na cijeli moj život sa tobom. Kada si otišla, osjetila sam da je kraj jedne ere, da je umrlo dijete u meni. Dugo mi je trebalo da pronađem opet to dijete i još uvijek ponekad osjecam tu prazninu u sebi…Kao sto si sama često znala reci, samo sto me nisi nosila i rodila…ali kao da jesi, voljena bakice.

Tog jutra, nakon vijesti o njezinom odlasku, jos prije nego sto sam nazvala mamu, krenula sam vjezbati...Zeljela sam odraditi sve vjezbice koje inace svakodnevno radim, jer to je bio jedini nacin na koji sam mogla zaokupirati svoje tijelo i mozak.

Vjezbala sam I plakala. Plakala sam za proslim vremenima kada sam bila djevojcica i kada je moja baka brinula za mene i strepila nadamnom, plakala sam zbog toga sto pred kraj njezinog zivota ja nisam bila dovoljno fizicki, ni psihicki jaka, da se brinem o njoj i da joj drzim ruku u tom trenutku njezinog prelaska na drugi svijet. I danas placem i tesko mi je. I mislim da neke stvari nikada nece biti lakse, ili manje bolne. Jedino sto mogu uciniti je prihvatiti tu bol, osvijestiti je, osjetiti je i otpustiti je, u vidu neceg konstruktivnog, ili kreativnog, u vidu stvaranja neceg pozitivnog, u trenutku kada najvise boli i vuce na negativno. 

I zauvijek u mom srcu nositi sjecanje na najsnazniju, fizicki i psihicki govoreci, zenu koju sam u zivotu upoznala...moju baku Zoricu.

zenske haljine

One relaxing Sunday afternoon at the town Bakar

 

Hello lovelies!

As promised, I'll try to update my blog more often :-)

This time I want to share just a couple of photos taken one Sunday afternoon at the town Bakar, in Croatia.

It's going to be like a little photo diary, and I'll try to post this type of content more often.

So, the story behind these photos is: It was a lovely sunny Sunday afternoon spent in a company of my family. We went with my Mum to a nearby little town called Bakar, to spend some quality time together, take a walk by the sea and eat some good food at a local dining place that we've been visiting for years now, as the seafood is really delicious there :-)

As the day of my birthday I spent visiting the island of Brijuni with my hubby and my son and some friends, the next weekend was the time to celebrate with my Mum, and just enjoy each other's company and little joys of life.

For the occasion I wore:

Shirt: Abercrombie & Fitch

Jeans: Zara

Belt: Vintage

Sunglasses: Zara

Bag: Mango

Sandals: dr. Martens

(fun fact: EVERYTHING is second hand- except for the sunnies, but they're quite old too!)

I vlogged about this day here:

And here is a review video of my new dr. Marten's sandals (in case you were wondering about the fit and the sizing and all that jazz...):

I filmed vlog in Croatian language and the review in english and I'm trying to also film in italian (mostly reviews of Italian beauty and make up products), so everyone can enjoy watching my videos :-)

I'll talk to you soon!

Birthday trip at the island of Brijuni in Croatia!

Hello world!

How are you guys doing, what's up with you?

I'm back to blogging, I've been meaning to sit down and write a new post for a while now, but I was just so busy with life basically! I've had covid (for the whole month of May), and then when I started slowly gathering my energy again, there were tons of things awaiting me, mostly housework and tidying up the house lol!

But, on 5th. of June, for my birthday, we decided to take a family trip to the island of Brijuni. It's one of the Croatian national parks and it's really, really beautiful place.

It was the first time I visited the Brijuni islands and it was such a fun and beautiful experience. We went there with some friends and their kids so our little one had great time too, playing with his friend.

We used rent-a-bike service and it was the best decision as we were able to explore the island by bikes, and see lots of different spots of the island in just one afternoon.

We ate delicious food at the restaurant by the sea, went to visit the local Zoo (it was super interesting for the little ones), and Dino park!

Overall, we created lots of nice memories for lifetime and it was the best birthday present ever!

You can check out my vlog video from that day here (in croatian language):

Even though I wasn't as active here on my blog lately, as I would have wanted to, I was pretty good at keeping up with my youtube channel, bringing you new content even several times a week (I'm filming videos in croatian, english, and also I just started filming them in italian so my italian speaking audience will have something to look forward to!).

I hope you enjoyed this post, I'll be back soon with more summer photos :-)

xo from Croatia!